yesterday I went in for another blood test (yes, my arms are black and blue from all of them). My hcg level was 450...that's not double since Monday and not as high as I or the doctor would have liked. The rate seems to be slower than it was last week and that is the main concern. It did still go up, just slowly. Again, this going every two days and finding the numbers STILL undesirable is putting me on an emotional roller coaster that is more than I can handle most moments of the day. John said, no more. I'm not allowed to go back until next week when there will hopefully be more of a difference between the days and consequently a hcg level that is compatible with getting an ultrasound so we can find out more information. I need prayers for peace and that I would keep trusting God not some hormone level number. I'm at the point where I don,t think there's any way to protect myself from the pain of loss and maybe that's not even the right focus for me to have.
my heart and my flesh may fail, but the Lord is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.. I hope this is true for me.
Rejoicing that you are back safely and still pregnant! Love you guys!
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