Ultrasound Tomorrow

Tomorrow at 2 or sometime after that, John and I going to the hospital to get an ultrasound. This will be the first since the transfer and all the blood tests, and it should show us more clearly what is going on than the hcg levels. It's surreal to think that tomorrow night we could know for sure that we have a baby (babies) growing inside of my (Lord willing with a good heartbeat by now) or we could know for sure that the babies are gone. With how things have gone the last three weeks, it's also not impossible that there could be more waiting involved.

Part of me doesn,t even want to go through with the ultrasound. Although it's been torture not knowing for all these weeks, it's also been ignorant bliss at times thinking, "I'm pregnant. I have a baby. I'm a mom." To have all that taken away in one minute could be very hard. Then again if the babies are there and doing OK, it will help a lot to decrease my anxiety. If there's a heartbeat tomorrow, the chance of miscarriage goes down to less than 3%.

Thank you dear friends for all your prayers. Could you please pray for us again us tomorrow (Wed. Afternoon in China, Tues. Early morning US)? Pray for John and I to be at peace and pray for our little ones.